Final reckoning

I thought I'd begin my final broadcast with the opening lines of one of my favourite songs and which seem to be appropriate:

The party's over
It's time to call it a day
They've burst your pretty balloon
And taken the moon away
Now you must wake up
All dreams must end
Take off your make-up
The party's over
It's all over, my friend

Actually, I think I may have combined bits of the first two verses, but the point is well made. It's amazing how empty life becomes when you suddenly finish a show. The applause dies away, the camaraderie of being with your fellow actors is gone and you're stuck at home washing your smalls when you feel you should be out rehearsing. Of course, there will be other shows, but until the next one comes along you just bathe in the memories with a warm friendly glow. For a time, Thelma and I even forgot our differences and patched over the unpleasantness about the incident with Dickie's gnomes last year.

Our lady President, Dame Vivian AuFait, told me in passing that she thinks Murder at Checkmate Manor has been one of our greatest successes. Almost, she said, a triumph! She particularly loved being in the new theatre at The Playhouse and enjoyed regaling the younger ladies with stories of her early years on the boards. And she actually did perform on boards. She was quite a looker in her day and was a bit of a Forces sweetheart. Oh yes. When she first started performing it was with ENSA, going out to entertain the troops by singing songs round the piano in foreign climes where the stages tended to be made out of two empty Tizer crates and a couple of planks. She was very popular with the boys and whenever they saw her arrive they all came running. Because they'd been starved you see.

For those not in the know, Gordon had to finish the remaining three nights of the play as Sylvia was not well enough to come back. I am pleased to report that she's up and about again now, but she has got to appear in court next week charged with assault. Apparently she lashed out at one of the doctors when she went in for her scan after the accident last week. It transpires that after performing a scan, the doctor was going through Sylvia's medical records and she misheard what he was reading out about one of her existing conditions. It's amazing how the words "acute angina" can be misconstrued.

There will be the usual classes throughout July but all Guild activities take a break in August as so many of our members disperse for annual holidays and the like. Come September we shall start up again and that month we shall be holding auditions for our South Pacific on Ice extravaganza which I am pleased to report that Rev Reg is hoping to be back in harness for as director. Not that we weren't very grateful to David but I know Deep End are keen to get him back in their fold.

I am trying to gloss over a certain troubling rumour that there is disquiet in the Guild. We have an AGM coming up and I am told there is a plot to try and oust me as Chairman. Some people think I have let it all go to my head and that I'm turning into Margaret Thatcher. Dickie tells me I should be flattered as at least she's a Blue and that it could have been worse - I could have been compared to that Hazel Blears creature. I am not sure who is at the bottom of all this. I have a feeling that my predecessor, Emma Royde, has something to do with it. Or possibly Estelle Urtz. I always said we should never have allowed an American into the Guild. I mean, you don't find English surnames with Zs in, do you?

So, dear readers, until the next production, au revoir, and thanks for reading!